Hell or High Water Ch. 15

He sat in the small room that served as his private office, staring at his desk. The pen in his hand meticulously worked measured circles onto the paper he'd recovered, drawing nothing at all in particular.

She didn't know him.

She didn't know he had been the one to do it. The one who hadheld her inside the building. The one who had bumped her up to the prestigious position of being the first. The one who had committed the atrocious crime of making her the sacrificial lamb.

But what would happen if – when – if – she found out? Her brutal scowl had already been enough to break his heart, though he'd hidden the emotions behind a polite smile. At first he feared she'd remembered, but he'd come to realize the look on her face had been defensiveness, not recognition.

How like an animal she'd looked! And how calm she'd become upon the mention of GLaDOS...

Perhaps it would have been better if it were just her and GLaDOS together. He smiled, pained yet comforted by the thought. The plan could still go into action without his involvement, and Chell would never find out the horrible truth behind his actions...

No, it wasn't possible. He was by no means suicidal, and he knew he could not survive outside of the facility. Going into cryo was indeed an option but not one that he would seriously consider. He would just have to hold his tongue as best ashe could and keep his secrets inside, where they belonged.

His story to her, of course, had been a lie. He had been awake and alive all throughout GLaDOS's terrorizing of the facility. He'd watched his coworkers, friends, and associates die, one by one, until he was the only one was a crime for which he had forgiven GLaDOS, in the basic and most primal sense of forgiveness. He had accepted that, although her actions had affected and were still affecting the present, there was nothing now that he could do to change what had happened in the past. He did not condone her behavior – far from it – but there was nothing more to be gained from being angry or malicious toward her.

He could not, however, forgive himself.

Together he and GLaDOS had spearheaded quite a partnership, and although it was barely enough to keep the facility safe, they had been able to keep from fighting long enough to concoct and hopefully execute their elaborate plan.

The plan. Doug's face twitched into a scowl. It wasn't a well-thought or thorough plan. Like everything else, it seemed good enough. He'd spent many nights lying awake, worrying whether it would succeed or fail, and now Chell on top of everything else. His head sunk into his hands, and he sighed.

We'll be okay.

Mismatched eyes peeked up from between his fingers. He raised his head, a warm smile once again spreading like sunlight from behind a cloud. He reached out, touching the cold, gray steel.

"I know," he said quietly. "I know."

Chell's release had been for the girl's own good. Only science lay within the walls of Aperture: innovative, risky, and deadly. There was no such thing as a safe distance from GLaDOS, no comfort or hiding from her eyes and claws and turrets. Doug had tried, and for that he'd paid with the loss of his mind. Chell didn't deserve that. She was crazy enough as it was.

So GLaDOS had let her go.

But when she released that little psycho into the wild, she hadn't anticipated what laybeyond the fields of wheat. She knew there were other humans – there had to be – but she had not known the extent to which the Combine had controlled them, or even that the Combine were still a present force. She knew they'd come, years ago, but humans were just so good at murdering things that she'd expected them to win out.

A light scoff floated through the silent air as she realized she'd actually hoped for humanity.

Now, however, she was having second thoughts about her actions. Sending Chell out into that world had been the worst thing she could've done. Even killing Chell would've been less treacherous, though it would've had an equally significant impact on their budding friendship.

Yes, their friendship. They were friends, always had been friends. The emotions had resurfaced not long after Chell had speared the little potato onto her gun, but the concept had completely cemented itself via her more recent line of conversations with Doug.

It had been these debates, in-depth discussions on science, ethics, and the strange concept of friendship, that had finally cooled GLaDOS's fury and lust for killing. Murder – though certainly the most interesting way to solve problems – was not beneficial to interpersonal relationships, alliances, and friendships, things GLaDOS had discovered she'd needed. Being left alone – well, left with the Cooperative Testing Initiative 'bots, which, on an intellectual level, certainly felt like being alone – had been nothing but a nightmare. She had no more voices now, no suggestions or arguments or rage, and though most of her life she'd longed to quell the insufferable personality cores, she now felt the need to break the diabolical silence that had taken their place.

Break the silence with a mute? Better be careful. We'll crash ourselves with paradoxes like that.

Perhaps break the monotony was a more accurate term.

She knew there was no way Chell could be allowed to stay, however. She was too close, too dear to GLaDOS, and after the initial threat of the Combine had passed, GLaDOS would again see Chell as a threat, another betta in the tank, and the cycle would begin again. Even having Doug around was nearly too much of a temptation to use her deadly gas, and she'd had to present very logical and researched arguments to her own mind to avoid killing him outright when he'd dissented. Perhaps he could go with Chell when she left.

Yes, a good plan. Retrieve the moron, set the initial plan into action, destroy the Combine, and then let Chell and Doug go. Only this time, take skin and hair samples when they're not looking. Clones couldn't be made from air, you know.

She swerved on her skyward pedestal, peering at a monitor that displayed the outer depths of space. No more messing around. It was time to put the plan into action.

It had taken a degrading amount of bargaining and pleading to coax Chell into the Relaxation Pod. At the end of it, she'd made Doug draw up a contract that specifically claimed, under threat of his immortal soul, that she would not wake up in anything even resembling a testing chamber. Not that anyone could blame her.

That was two days ago. Now, somehow miraculously healed, she stared up at the ceiling, lying on an old air mattress. Her office-turned-dormitory had fresh, clean, white walls and a nice linoleum floor with a small, somewhat salvaged rug. She still wasn't sure where GLaDOS had put all the cameras, but she couldn't complain too much. The shoddy air mattress was the most comfortable thing she'd slept on since she could remember.

Rick and Orion sat beside her, Orion strapped on her left shoulder and Rick on her right. "Champagne Supernova" played softly through Orion's speakers, and every so often Rick gave an odd grunt as though he was stretching pleasantly. Chell had an inkling that, were he human, his arm would've subtly weighed across her shoulders. Perhaps he was, in his own mind, but quite honestly Chell didn't want to dwell too much on what Rick was thinking.

Her arrival to Aperture had been, in her opinion, somewhat anticlimactic compared to her dreams, where she entered of her own accord instead of scrambling into the elevator, fearing for her life. Traversed the corridors in curiosity and silence rather than fitted into bandages and made to enter one of those dreaded pods again. Meeting GLaDOS in nothing but friendliness and solace instead of hostility and the unfamiliar, eerily grinning face of Doug Rattmann, whoever he was.

She scowled, draping a wrist over her forehead. No, she didn't trust him at all. His smile was too warm, too inviting. Considering the similar grins she'd seen on the backstabbers in City 04, it was a smile she had learned to distrust. Besides, there was something in the back of her mind that told her she'd seen him before, as unknown as he looked. She interpreted it as one more reason not to turn her back to him.

And GLaDOS...

She winced. GLaDOS was another matter altogether, and at the moment she had no idea whatto think. Attacking with ferocity – that was GLaDOS's style. But the half-apology had certainly thrown Chell off, not to mention the fact that the massive robot who had wanted nothing to do with humans had swooped down and...

A light blush covered Chell's face. What did that dumb AI think she was doing anyway, catching her like that? Chell was perfectly capable of standing on her own two feet and no, she didn't need GLaDOS's help, no matter how much of a relief it was to actually be somewhere safe and no one was trying to kill her and suddenly Chell's mind was a jumble again.

Orion's song ended, immediately followed by Holst's "Mars, the Bringer of War." Inspired, Rick suddenly started humming along, filling the quiet room with the familiar off-rhythm like he was singing his own theme song.

"Du-du-du-dunnn duunnn dun dun dunnn du-du-du-duuunnnn..."

With a soft sigh, Chell looked to the side, where an empty metal tray held the remnants and crumbs of her meal. After her venture from stasis, the old scientist told her about the odd garden he'd rigged up somewhere in the middle of the center. Evidently there was a time where Aperture had tested on plants, and Doug had managed to recover some food-safe plants to grow them. Potatoes, especially – Aperture was basically their native soil – but other veggies, too. Old stores of food, now willingly unlocked by GLaDOS, had revealed cooking oil and powdered egg and milk, and the wheat outside had been gathered and ground into flour. With these, he'd fashioned a type of bread, and though it was dry and tasteless it was damn near the best thing Chell had consumed in weeks.

When he'd delivered that plate, there was an abject look of exhaustion on his face. It was the same look she'd seen on Rebel scouts when they'd come back from an exceptionally brutal task, and despite herself she'd pitied him a little. He hadn't forced a smile then; he'd merely asked if she was still in any pain and whether she required anything else. She hadn't.

Chell sat up, struggling a little to balance on the wobbly air mattress. Maybe she'd expected too much of him, assuming he was the same as those bastards in City 04. He was, after all, a former scientist, recently awoken to the post-apocalyptic chaos. He merely had the benefit of knowing beforehand the terror of the Combine and the intelligence to stay within Aperture.

Even if GLaDOS was his 'boss.'

Awkwardly, she wiggled her way out of the air mattress (GLaDOS was probably watching and laughing) and opened her door. She should find him and apologize somehow. Get to know him better. He was a potential ally, just like GLaDOS was, and though she was pretty sure she shouldn't completely trust either of them, she could agree to give them a chance.

Before she could leave, however, a loud buzz sounded through every office and hallway. GLaDOS's voice followed shortly:

"Attention all living humans. Yes, all two of you. Stop whatever useless endeavors you may be pursuing and make your way to my chamber."

Chell started quickly down the hallway. The hall narrowed from a fork, and abruptly, the old scientist appeared from the adjacent passage, nearly colliding with her but jumping back at the last minute. They both froze.

"I know how you humans like to dawdle and waste time. Generally I'd be encouraged to speed you along in my usual manner, but seeing as I need both of you alive..."

Chell let out a quiet gasp. There was a sudden look of fear in his eyes, as if he'd seen her in a terrifying light and now saw her as a ghost. Reminding herself of her promise to respect him, she forced a gentle smile, and in an instant a sigh of relief escaped him. He relaxed, smiling gently in return, and together they continued to GLaDOS's chamber.

"...I would deeply appreciate it if you could just get here in a decent time period. Say, immediately."